Frustration

We've experienced a severe snow storm the last couple of days, and since any sort of travel is discouraged, that means lots of studio time.  I decided to start work on some 12 by 12 pieces I wanted for my gallery show in May.  I had no firm idea of what I was going to do, but figured that the smaller area required hand stitching as opposed to pieced work or FMQ'g.  Borrowing a technique described in a recent Art Quilt Studio magazine, I used Inktense blocks to make marks on several small pieces of damp cotton, and then diffused those marks with more water and elbow grease.  I was thrilled with the result, but the backs of the pieces were often more appealing.  I still didn't have a clear idea of what I might be doing, but decided to try using several pieces of fused glass that had been gifted as focal points. One piece had an amazing orange-y pink/brown colour that I just loved. I doesn't photograph well so you'll just have to take my word for it.

I did a bit of rubber stamping, as suggested in the magazine article.  Maybe not a good idea.  Then I selected thread and such for the embellishment. After quilting it,  I found I wanted to accent the stitched area a bit more, so needle felted a wisp of roving into it, the colour of which just about matched the darker lines of the InkTense blocks.  Glued on the glass, and stitched it down with invisible thread.  Started stitching, and worked on it, slowly, for about an hour.

I'm not thrilled.  As I said the colour is not true.  The background is an orange-y/pink with vague brown streaks.

This has sent me into a "blue funk".  My creative skills appear to have diminished significantly over the past couple of years.  I haven't produced anything that really "stirs my blood", in all that time.  I wonder if this is a part of aging, or maybe the first echoes of diminishing brain function?  Maybe a function of poor preparation?  Regardless, I am frustrated.  Creating an image and puzzling out how to a achieve it, used to come easily to me.  Have I boggled my mind with too many new and different techniques?  My two most significant mentors were aunts who remained creative well into their 80's and 90's.  Does this mean that I'm aging that much more quickly than them? This is certainly the longest period of creative block I've ever experienced.

Many years ago, I started a "prompt" jar, by writing down bits of ideas on paper, as they occurred, and putting them in a jar for use when I didn't know how to proceed with a troublesome design.  I also have a couple of pages in my sketch book containing similar notes.  Maybe it's time.  And maybe it's time to abandon my plans for the 12 by 12's, and find something else for my show.