Satisfying the soul

When asked what I do, I use the term "fibre artist".  Since I am really a dilettante, in many, many ways, I think that the term describes me nicely.  But someone looking at me from the outside might call be an art quilter, as most of my pieces have quilting in them somewhere.  I did start out as a more traditional quilter, but my family used to joke that I could never find a pattern that I couldn't change.  I was surrounded by family who were crafty, but usually in a fibre related form, as my grandmother and paternal aunts were all embroiderers and quilters.  They, too, would tackle any creative sort of task without fear.  I have taught embroidery and traditional quilting.  I've taught art quilting techniques.  But, I've also taught mixed media. I exhibit my fibre work.  I have a whole collection of variously coloured ribbons from local agriculture exhibition competitions.  But I only buy fabric that is white, black or navy, as I paint or dye any fabric I use in my work.  

What I'm saying is that I aspire to be accepted for my original work, but this is really an uphill battle, when one works with fibre. Otherwise, I pretty much follow my muse, where ever it leads.  When one thinks of the term "battle", one thinks of effort, work, fear, and exhaustion--all valid terms.  Lately, I've found myself tired of fighting.

So-o-o, I'm making traditional quilt tops that will be finished and given away to charity.  Three are finished, and one will be finished today.  Another one is planned and arranged, ready to piece. Over a year ago, before hurting my shoulder and losing the ability to use a rotary cutter, my husband and I cut a laundry baskets full of various shapes for this sort of use.  They have been sitting in my studio and making me feel guilty ever since.  Three of the tops mentioned have been made using 21/2" squares.  I had a large Zip Loc bag tightly filled with them, and have only used half of that, at this point.  

Now, here is my question.  Why, given my history, do I feel so guilty about finding so much pleasure in doing this very traditional task?